Sharma Ji is doing good in life; Eating healthy and getting fit as well, but what concerns me is his Self Doubt and Inferiority Complex πŸ˜”

Dr. aakash bansal
Kshitij Roy

Β |Β 1 minute to read
Fitness Articles

"I can't handle it anymore"

"Why always me" "Must be something wrong me with me only" "He always gets it, why I don't" Mental wellbeing is one of the most important and personal topics that we fail to discuss with others, mostly because of one simple reason "what he/she will think about me". This week I got a call from one of my friend who is under tremendous stress because of his 9-6 Job. He used to be a fit person once but have gained weight now and thus more stressed about his unhealthy lifestyle. He didn't call me to discuss his mental issues, he wanted some advice on diet and workout. I know this guy from quite some time, so I knew the issue was something else. I talked to him for 30 mins before he actually told me the real reason for his unhealthy lifestyle. From sometime he was getting pushback at work, that has put him under self-doubt and he started overthinking. Be it day or night, he was constantly trying to prove himself. In this entire situation, his focus deviated from his diet and workout. Binge eating became a part of the usual routine and workout took a back seat. He gained 15kgs in 8 months and now he doesn't know what needs to be done. I had nothing much to say to console him. The damage had been done already but I asked him few questions that led us to the solution to his problem: 1. Are your office issues under your control? NO 2. Can you change your boss voluntarily? NO 3. Can you eat as per your will and choice? YES 4. After office hours, do you have time for workout? YES 5. Does your work restrict you from living a healthy lifestyle? NO 6. Is your constant nagging helping you even a bit? NO 7. Can you concentrate on your work and improve, while taking so much stress? NO The purpose of these questions was to make him understand this Vicious Cycle that we all get into. I understand that everyone has stress in life because of something or the other but have we ever tried to think about the peripheral consequences that make it even more worse. In this case, the office stress is not under his control, he cannot do anything in the situation that he shared with me. If I would have been in the same situation, I may have been undergoing the same stress. But he did one mistake in this situation, he neglected the factors which were under his control - Food and Workout. Was the stress of job not enough for him that he added an extra burden of guilt by gaining weight? Try to understand this never-ending cycle. My only solution to his issue was to break this cycle. Control the things that are in your hand. I know its easier said than done but somewhere you have to take the lead and turn the things in your favour. Quantified diet, resistance training, macros calculation, drop in body fat% - all these things are not only for fat loss and muscle gain but they also play an important role in your mental wellbeing. Look at a bigger picture. Your energy levels are maintained, you are more focussed in your work, your productivity increases, your confidence boosts up, you start accepting the fact that, "Yes, You Can Do It". Do you think it's easy to remain fit? Trust me if that had been the case, everyone around you would have been fit. It takes sweat and blood to maintain that lifestyle. If you have achieved that, then why are you going in a phase of denial now and don't want to accept your capabilities? Why you self-doubt your work? Everyone has flaws and so do you but that doesn't make you inferior or weaker than anyone else. I was always very conscious about my looks. Just imagine an 18-year-old guy who weighs just 45 kgs. I never used to wear T-Shirts because of my skinny arms. I had that inferiority complex in me. Being a medico, my study hours had always been hectic and stressful. My sole reason to enter the gym was to gain weight, be it fat or muscle, I just wanted to gain weight. Within a year, I won my first university title. That was a eureka moment for me. 100s of people in the audience were cheering for me. A guy who never used to wear T-Shirts because of skinny arms was standing and posing on a stage in front of 100 people. That was a time and today it is, I have never looked back. This shift in confidence scale was only because of the right nutrition and focussed approach. Just imagine if I would have been stressed because of studies at that time, I may not have been here today. And do you think that I don't have any ongoing issues in my life right now, and everything is on track because I hit the gym daily and eat right? πŸ™‚ I am not a counsellor who is trying to recommend any solution for your mental health. That's an expert's job who can handle it way better than me. But the only thing that I have learned from my experience is, TALK and TALK and TALK. Everyone has at least one good listener in their life. Find that person and talk to him/her. You might not get any solution to your problem but believe me, you will feel much much better. I can give you 100s of examples where I have seen people going from Worst to Best and one common thing among everyone was Right Nutrition. Never underestimate this factor. This is something which is in your control. Don't let this slip from your hands. Trust me, you are not the only one who is struggling. Hold someone's hand and the journey will be worth living. Along with your physical health, make your mental health also a priority because Every Decision Matters!! Have a safe Workout!! - Dr. Aakash Bansal #SharmaJiKaBeta #Fittr #Bettr #Smarttr

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